He was ready to burn the bridge—then he waited five minutes.
Eli was shaking with anger. One text from his brother—just one—had snapped the cord of patience he’d been holding all week.
It wasn’t the content.
It was the timing.
The tone. The pattern.
That familiar urge surged: Say something. Defend yourself. Be done with this.
His thumbs hovered over his phone.
Then he remembered something his therapist had told him: “What rises will fall. What burns hot will cool.”
So he waited.
Five minutes. Then ten.
The emotion softened—not disappeared, but disarmed.
He didn’t hit send.
And for once, silence felt like strength—not avoidance.
Emotions Pass—But Consequences Can Stay
Anger. Craving. Jealousy. Urgency.
They rise like waves. Loud, insistent, convincing.
But what we do inside those waves often becomes permanent.
Words we can’t unsay. Decisions we can’t reverse. Connections we can’t repair.
To pause isn’t weakness.
It’s wisdom.
Because not every fire needs your match.
What Psychology Says About the Rise and Fall of Emotion
According to neuroscientist Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor, an untriggered emotional response has a natural lifespan of 90 seconds in the body.
It’s the stories we attach—the spirals we feed—that prolong the pain.
Mindfulness studies from Oxford University show that labeling emotions and observing them without judgment dramatically reduces their intensity and duration.
The takeaway?
You don’t have to suppress it.
You just don’t have to believe everything it says.
Let it come. Let it crest. Let it pass.
Eli’s Quiet Win
Later that night, his brother called.
Apologized for the tone.
Explained the stress behind it.
Eli listened. Really listened.
Not because he’d buried the anger.
But because he let it rise and fall without dragging his identity into it.
That moment became a turning point.
Not in the argument. In himself.
If You’re About to React, Remember This
- Name the emotion. Don’t become it.
- Wait 90 seconds before responding. Let your wiser self catch up.
- Ask: Will this matter in a month? In a year?
- Cravings pass. So does rage. So does the need to be right.
- Say this: I am not what I feel. I am the space that feels it—and lets it go.
Because anything that can rise will also fall. You don’t have to fall with it.